hermit 'frustrations'
i say that i am a 'sort of' hermit, because that is what I am. i like to spend a lot of time alone but i do have a small circle of friends and other commitments. Thankfully, as we've all grown a little older, commitments are more occasional than they used to be which largely allows me a lot of solitary time.
but ...
when commitments come, they come along like buses, all at the same time and that is where I am starting from today.
last week wasn't a particularly focused one with my contemplation etc as a friend had been taken ill which was worrying. thankfully all seems well now but it certainly distracted me from my 'solitary thoughts' for a while. Ideally, I would have liked this week to be a quiet one spent largely alone being as close to a 'proper hermit' as I could . with reading, meditation and walks.
things rarely work that way though and today i have to go away for a few days to see someone for a few days and on my return, i have to prepare for a visitor arriving at the weekend and then on Monday, a meal for an old friend's birthday. It isn't that these are not enjoyable but i would have preferred them not to happen right now. Hopefully though, the train journey today will be peaceful and allow for an hour or so of internally saying the jesus prayer with my discreet κομποσκίνι (komboskini) .. Greek prayer rope.
I can't pinpoint the quotes but there are a number of occasions in various books (possibly including the bible) where we are told that however deep in a peaceful meditation or silence we are, if someone calls us in need or there is a knock at the door, we should stop our practice and deal with the situation.
After all, and i will discuss this another time, even the Desert Fathers rarely spent all of their time in the desert and often returned to an active life. Meditation and contemplation are NOT designed for escapism purposes, but to compose ourselves and listen to God in the silence and then use that to help others and the world. While theirs was a long life of silence before return, it appears that my role is to have my silence interrupted more frequently!
and with that .. I have a train to catch .. silence will have to wait until next tuesday it seems!